A lot of people stay in incompatible relationships because we've been conditioned to believe breaking up with someone is wrong, or mean or insensitive, but the reality is that sometimes relationships just don't work out, and that's okay. You're not a horrible person for not wanting to be with someone anymore.
Sometimes it’s just not worth it. Every situation is different, but we have to be realistic if it is only causing suffering and pain. We have to love ourselves enough to protect ourselves if it is causing more harm than good. Some situations are possible to improve, and some just aren’t. We can change our perspective, but in the end, our mental health has to matter.
You Can't Understand Each Other
If you and your partner don't get on well straight away, this can tell a lot about how good of a match you and your partner are. If you can't figure out how they're feeling, thinking, or what they need, they're probably not the ideal person for you - and vice versa. It's better to be with someone with whom you can actually communicate; someone who can pick up on and understand your nonverbal signs, recognize your voice tone, and 'get' what you're trying to say. Otherwise, misunderstandings and communication breakdowns will start building up in your connection.
There is little or no attraction
Even if everything seems to be in order on paper, if there is no romance or chemistry, it will not work. You may have a Best Friend, but not necessarily a Significant Other, if you are unaware of such factors.
As a result, you'll be naturally drawn to folks with whom you have more than friends' attraction. According to Robert Sternberg's Triarchic Theory of Love, even if closeness and commitment are there, without passion, the love you share will be platonic, like the love you have with your friends and family.
You Feel Isolated
Everyone else can't see what you're doing because you're socializing alone.
Do you notice that when you and your partner go out, it's almost always just the two of you — no buddies, parties, or group get-togethers?
Do you never spend time with their friends, if you have met them at all? Is their family still a mysterious bunch of individuals you've never met despite the fact that you've been together for a while? If you responded yes to any of these questions, you might have a problem. It's critical that you enjoy with and learn more about your partner's family. Couples that make the effort to be close to the other key persons in their partner's life have happier and lasting relationships.
You Try To Avoid Conflict At All Cost
It's all about balance - although frequent arguing is certainly not ideal, a couple that never disagrees on anything is also not healthy. You must be honest with one another and talk openly about how you feel, even if you disagree with one another.
Constantly pretending that everything is fine or agreeing to the desires of the other person does not strengthen the relationship and may, in fact, lead to a disastrous blow-up later.
If given and taken constructively, conflict may be a wonderful, relationship-building experience.
It can then lead to personal development and mutual understanding.
There Is A Lot Of Conflict and Arguments
It's entirely acceptable and healthy to have disagreements with your spouse on occasion, especially if it's over something significant to the two of you – after all, we didn't chose this person to be with a clone of ourselves. When the argument is continual and over the tiniest of issues, the disagreements become a problem. Fighting filthy - yelling, calling each other names, shaming each other, carrying grievances, and emotional manipulation – is far worse. Being in a relationship with someone who tends to bring out the worst in you is never a good thing.
Both of You Do Not Become Versions of Yourselves
Having a spouse who provides you the motivation and incentive to change for the better is the characteristic of any good, loving relationship. In fact, that's the point: it has to be something you want for yourself, not something someone came up with.
Regardless of whether your partner is annoyed or dissatisfied with the existing you, pushing change on yourself *solely* because "they want it" and you don't is useless and unsustainable — you must desire it for yourself. This applies to a variety of aspects, including how you dress, speak, and associate with others; only you have the authority to decide who you wish to be. If you're not sure if you want to display your true colors to your significant other, don't.