What is the Inner Child
The Inner Child is capable of experiencing a wide spectrum of powerful emotions, including joy and sorrow, happiness and grief. The Inner Child uses the right-brain modes of being, feeling, and experiencing, whereas the Adult uses the left-brain patterns of doing, thinking, and acting while also having a full variety of emotions. "Doing" refers to the exterior physical world and taking action, but "being" refers to one's psychological, emotional, and spiritual state of being. "Doing" is an external experience, whereas "being" is a personal one.
The Inner Child is the part of us that is instinctive, our "gut" feelings. The Child has been referred to as the subconscious, but it is only that way because we have paid it so little attention. When we want to learn about the unconscious, it becomes readily available to consciousness. When we attempt to learn from our Inner Child, our emotions, thoughts, and memories from childhood are stored in our Inner Child.
We can observe the child in two ways: when it is cherished by the Inner Adult and when it is hated, criticized, or abandoned. The Inner Adult has been neglected and abandoned. Only one Inner Child exists. The Inner Adult is either loving or unloving that Child at any given time, and the Child's feelings and conduct are a direct result of the Adult's decision to learn about the Child's desires, demands, and emotions and assume accountability for them, or to guard against this knowledge and responsibility.
The Misunderstood Child
When the Inner Adult decides to protect himself/herself from having to experience and be responsible for the Child's feelings and needs, the Adult disengages from the Child through humiliation, neglect, and indulgence. Inside, the Child feels unwanted, forsaken, and very much alone. The Child believes that it must be terrible, wrong, unlovable, unimportant, inadequate, or insufficient, otherwise it would not have been abandoned, first by exterior adults (parents and grandparents) and then by the Inner Adult.
Because it feels that being wrong leads to rejection, the deserted Inner Child is continually scared of being wrong. As a result, it seeks to discover the "correct" way to live in the world. As a means of controlling rejection, it gets addicted to "shoulds" and regulations. It fosters a desire to be perfect as well as the conviction that perfection is possible. The internal divide between the Adult and the Child manifests itself in perfectionism and the dread of being wrong.
With no Inner Adult to assist deal with the emptiness of external abandonment, the abandoned Inner Child turns to numerous addictions to fill itself up.
The Beloved Kid
It is the natural Child within us who feels loved when the Child feels cherished. It is our vitality, zeal, and sense of amazement. The cherished Child within us is so unique that even a brief encounter with it brings us complete joy in just being alive. The adored Child is vivacious, full of passion, playfulness, and inquisitiveness, and is always open to ideas and experiences. Our innate Inner Child is our ability to trust, as well as our creativity and intuition. The Inner Child is gentle, sensitive, flowing, and highly loving whether it was loved as a child by its guardians or has been tenderly re-parented by the Inner Adult for a long time.
The Grown-Up
The Grown Up or the Adult is the portion of us that is rational and thinks. The Adult's feelings are derived from cognition, but the Child's thoughts are derived from its feelings.
Adults are more interested with doing than with being, with acting rather than with experiencing. The Adult can be thought of as the yang, masculine, or left-brain component of oneself, whereas the Child is thought of as the yin, feminine, or right-brain aspect. The Adult might be considered the conscious mind, or the linear-thinking intellect.
In terms of intent and behavior, the Adult is the decision-maker. The Adult is always the one who decides to protect or learn, as well as the acts that follow the intent.
The Unloving Grown Up
The unloving Grown Up is the adult who has chosen to keep himself or herself from noticing, experiencing, feeling, and accepting responsibility for the Inner Child's anguish, fear, grief, discomfort, and extreme loneliness. The uncompassionate Adult also decides to absolve himself of responsibility for the happiness of the Child. Tasks, regulations, obligations, and humiliation take precedence over connectedness. By being perhaps an authoritative or indulgent Inner Parent, the unloving Adult disengages from and disregards the Inner Child. The unloving Adult is critical, judgmental, humiliating, dismissing, and/or domineering when acting authoritarian. It is the internal voice that pretends to the child, telling him or her that they are evil, incorrect, insufficient, foolish, selfish, or irrelevant, as well as invalidating the child's feelings.
The Compassionate Grown Up
The powerful, devoted, courageous element of ourselves, the part of ourselves that is moral and behaves with integrity, is the loving Adult – the Adult who has decided to learn from and alongside the Inner Child. The caring Adult is interested in learning how to re-teach the Inner Child. It's dedicated to getting to know, love, nurture, support, and connect with the Inner Child. The confidence to look within, to face ourselves, and to know ourselves is found within the loving Adult. This is the positive Inner Grown Up, the part of us that has the ability to heal previous childhood scars and replace erroneous ideas with the truth.
Ways to Heal the Inner Child
Healing The Inner Child is an effective way to help yourself overcome your painful childhood experiences. In some cases, the wounds that your inner child has endured for years can be difficult to process, but by spending some time every day listening to it and giving it the attention it needs, you can move forward in your healing process. Here are some ways you can help your inner child. Awaken your creativity. Read a new book every day.
Write down your childhood memories. Writing them down can give your inner child the perspective it needs to heal. You can also use the journal to explore persistent feelings of shame or guilt. Having a therapist guide you through the process is a great idea. If you find it difficult to do this by yourself, consider seeking the assistance of a professional who specializes in working with inner children. This person will be able to offer guidance and techniques for helping your inner child.
Talking to your inner child is important because you can begin to understand what is causing your distress. A trained therapist will guide you through the process and help you identify and validate your feelings. For example, writing a letter to your inner child will allow you to give your inner child a more mature view of childhood memories and help you find reasons for how you responded to difficult circumstances in the past. By recognizing the larger picture, your inner child will be able to heal and move on.
It is vital to talk with your inner child about the painful memories that are affecting you. Often, it will help you understand why these feelings persist, and this will help you heal from them. You can also discuss your painful memories with a trained therapist or spiritual healer. You can also try healing yourself, but it is essential to share them with a trusted person. By talking with someone you trust, you'll be able to make a breakthrough.
It's important to remember that healing the inner child requires a trusted adult to guide you through it. Your inner child will need to be validated in order for you to be able to get over the pain. A trained therapist will be able to help you do this. Even if you're trying to go it alone, remember that the process will not be complete without a trusted person. Seeing a trusted person will help you overcome any pain you may have.
When you are ready to heal the inner child, it's crucial to know that it will not thank you for letting it out. However, it will not thank you for letting it come to light. In fact, healing the inner child is an ongoing process that you need to be patient with. In the end, you'll feel better and have a healthier life. This is a long process, and you'll need to make sure you are doing it the right way.
When you're ready, it's important to acknowledge your inner child's feelings and emotions. By acknowledging your inner child's feelings and needs, you can start to heal. The best way to do this is to take small steps and work your way up. It's important to be patient. A trained therapist will provide you with the tools to heal the wounded parts of yourself. He or she will also guide you in your healing.
A therapist can guide you through the healing process. By allowing your inner child to express herself through writing, you can help her identify and validate her feelings. By writing letters to her, you can begin the healing process and help her see the world in a different way. You can explain to your inner child what you've learned and how you have grown. This will help you heal. In addition, a therapist will listen to your inner child's concerns.
If you're unable to deal with your inner child's pain, a trained therapist will guide you through this process and help you understand the feelings that your inner child is trying to express. The inner child's feelings are always trying to make you feel better. A therapist will also guide you through this process and help you develop the skills to deal with your own pain. If you're able to identify your inner self, you'll be able to heal the rest of your life.